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I have tryed to download jigsaw puzzles to work on line, but it keeps on failing.? It tells me I need to download Java, and that don't work. I have Windows XP.

is there a site you can put jigsaw puzzles together on line for free? thanks?

what is the best free jigsaw puzzle of winter scenes on line?

I have tried to download Java, but once I get it downloaded it will not work, Help? I have Microsoft Internet Explorer. Love to work Jigsaw puzzles on line but it requires Java. I downloaded an update it asked me to do and now I can't get it to work. I have uninstalled and reinstalled so many times. Can you help. me bostinnett@embarqmail.com

How to make a jigsaw of a picture? I have a JPEG picture and I want to put the impression of a jigsaw puzzle on it (with all the lines and so on). I think I saw a graphics program that did that but I'm not sure which one. Can anyone help me or point me in the right direction?

I I just fineshed a 4000 peice puzzle. What is a Beautiful puzzle thats 5000+ peices? I have seen thousands on line at practically every jigsaw puzzle website. If anyone has any suggestions. I want it to be absolutely gorgeous! You get tired at seeing the same puzzles on all the websites that you visit. Thanks.

Does anyone know of a program that makes jigsaw puzzles? Does anyone know of a program that makes jigsaw puzzles and/or the puzzles with little squares with one missing so they can move around. I would prefer one were I can put in my own picture. I know they exist, I had one on my old computer, but I can't find a good one now. The program needs to be one that I can download to my computer so I don't have to upload the pic every time, and so I can play it off line.

Am I addicted to on line games? Since a couple of days I have discovered online jigsaw puzzles and now I seem to be completely addicted to them. I waste my precious time solving them. What can I do to stop my hankering for this newly acquired bad habit? I always despised people playing those silly computer and video games. Am I now one of them?

Blondes Finish Jigsaw Puzzle? A group of blondes walk into a bar. One of the women tells the bartender to line up a row of drinks for all of them. The gals lift their glasses and toast, "Here's to 51 days!" and they proceed to down their drinks. Once again, they tell the bartender to "line 'em up", and once again they toast 51 days and down their drinks. The bartender says, "I don't get it. Why in the world are you toasting 51 days?" One of the blondes explains, "We just finished a jigsaw puzzle. It had written on the box '2-4 years,' but we finished it in 51 days!"

What Should I name my New Paint Mare? Hello. I just got my paint mare yesterday and I am looking for a new name for her. She came with the name Winny, but we have a Aussie pup named Wenny, so the horses name will have to be changed. She is a loud dark bay an white tobiano. Very tall 15.3 hands. Sweet as pie. I am looking for something really catchy and unique. I have a palomino named Twinkie, so its needs to be along the lines of that. I have had so many people tell me they have never ever heard of a horse named Twinkie, and I want to get that reaction to her new name. If it helps on one side her pattern kinda looks like jigsaw puzzle pieces, and the other side I swear it looks like a ladies profile. Pretty cool markings. I cant wait to see what you all suggest. Thanks to everyone!!!!!!!

This is a controversial question but it needs to be asked because i know everyone is thinking it.....? .....Just what are your views on Jigsaw puzzles? Not much gets me angry apart from Australia and Foxes but Jigsaw puzzles.Good god! Is there a point to these useless things.You spend what seems like an ice age putting the bloody things together and then in the year 2016 when you have finally finished it,you dismantle the bloody thing and put it back in the box.That is it. you will then put it in the cuboard with Monopoly and Cludeo and a few months down the line when you are bored you will get it out again and attempt to put the ruddy thing together again.This will happen over and over until you die Does anyone else share my dislike for jigsaws? David P if your going to do your stupid little 'Stone Cold Steve Austin' type finger thing that doesent bother me,but next time just make sure you dont screw it up like you've done here,because it just makes you look retarded

A question for end times Biblical Scholars...? How do the scholars come up with the 7 year timeline for the Tribulation and which seal and bowl etc will happen during certain seasons? It seems to me that the scriptures used in Daniel and Revelations are difficult to interpret. It's like a huge maze to come up with this timeline. How do you know that this interpretation is accurate? When studying these scriptures, it seems like someone decided that this interpretation was just going to be accepted, and everyone else has just accepted it at face value because Biblical scholars have accepted this jigsaw puzzle as the correct interpretation. How do they (scholars) come up with the 7 year time line for the Great Tribulation. Is it possible that the 42 months (3-1/2 years) is based on a different calendar system than our modern day calendar. Or that the 42 months is referring to something entirely different? How can they be sure that the visions of Daniel apply to the end times and that they should be merged with Revelations?

What do u guyz think???Story of Ah Beng!!!? (Act 1) Ah Beng calls the telephone operator: Ah Beng: "Could you please tell me the time difference between Singapore and New York?" Operator: "Just a minute..." Ah Beng: "Thank you." Ah Beng got his answer and cut off the line. (Act 2) At a bar in New York, the man sat next to Ah Beng told the bartender, "JOHNNIE WALKER, SINGLE." and his companion said, "JACK DANIELS,SINGLE." The bartender turned to Ah Beng and asked, "AND YOU, SIR?" Ah Beng replied: "Tan Ah Beng, MARRIED." (Act 3) After completing a jigsaw puzzle he'd been working on for quite sometime, Ah Beng proudly shows off the finished puzzle to a friend. "It took me only 5 MONTHS to do it," Ah Beng said. "FIVE MONTHS? Why did you take so long." the friend asked. Ah Beng replied, "No, it is not long at all, look ! at the box, it says it is for 4 to 7 years". (Act 4) Ah Beng took part in the Singapore Manhunt Competition. During the Q&A segment, the host asks, "Name a drink that begins with the letter 'G'." The crowd shouts, "Gin! Gin!". Others exclaim, "No, its Grape Juice!" Another smart aleck yells, "Alamak, Gatorade!" Host : "Quiet please." Ah Beng laughs hysterically like a hyena before replying, "C'mon man, I don't need their help? I got more original answer. My answer is "Gu ni!" (milk in Hokkien) (Act 5) Ah Beng had just bought a new computer and was using it when he encountered some problems. After a few attempts, he decided to use the 'Help' command. Soon after, he became very irritated and called the computer shop for support. Ah Beng : "I pressed the 'F1' key for help... but it's been over half an hour & still nobody has come to help me...." (Act 6) In the class. Teacher: "Class, do you know the meaning of parents?" Ah Beng: "Yes, teacher, it means father and mother." Teacher: "Good. Can you give me an example?" Ah Beng: "Sure. Cowboy's parents means cowboy's father and mother. Also can say Cowboy's father is Cow Pay and Cowboy's mother is Cow Boo. So if they walk together, we can say they are 'Cow Pay Cow Boo'." (Act 7) Ah Beng with two red ears went to his doctor. The doctor asked him what had happened to his ears and he answered," I was ironing a shirt and the phone ring lor- but instead of picking up the phone, I accidentally picked up the iron and stuck it to my ear. So Kena lor!""Oh Dear!" the doctor exclaimed in disbelief. "But, what happened to the other ear?" Ah Beng: "That stupid fellow called back again loh!" (Act 8 ) Why did Ah Beng go to! a movie with his 18 friends? Because according to the advertisement, below 18 is not allowed to go in

51 days - funny or not? A group of blondes walk into a bar. One of the women tells the bartender to line up a row of drinks for all of them. The gals lift their glasses and toast, "Here's to 51 days!" and they proceed to down their drinks. Once again, they tell the bartender to "line 'em up", and once again they toast 51 days and down their drinks. The bartender says, "I don't get it. Why in the world are you toasting 51 days?" One of the blondes explains, "We just finished a jigsaw puzzle. It had written on the box '2-4 years,' but we finished it in 51 days!"

Anybody got a dumb blonde joke? I have a few: Q: Did you hear about the blonde who tried to blow up her husband's car? A: She burned her lips on the tailpipe.... Why did the blond get so excited after he finished the jigsaw puzzle in only six months? Because on the box, it said "From 2-4 years." A blonde tried to sell her old car. She was having a lot of problems selling it, because the car had 250,000 miles on it. One day, she told her problem to a brunette she worked with at a salon. The brunette told her, "There is a possibility to make the car easier to sell, but it's not legal." "That doesn't matter," replied the blonde, "if I only can sell the car." "Okay," said the brunette. "Here is the address of a friend of mine. He owns a car repair shop. Tell him I sent you and he will turn the counter in your car back to 50,000 miles. Then it should not be a problem to sell your car." The following weekend, the blonde made the trip to the mechanic. About one month after that, the brunette asked the blonde, "Did you sell your car?" "No," replied the blonde, "why should I? It only has 50,000 miles on it." Three blondes were sitting by the side of a river holding fishing poles with the lines in the water. A game warden came up behind them, tapped one on the shoulder and said, "Excuse me, ladies, I'd like to see your fishing licenses." "We don't have any." replied the first blonde. "Well, if you're going to fish, you need fishing licenses." "But officer," replied the second blonde, "we aren't fishing. We all have magnets at the end of our lines and we're collecting debris off the bottom of the river." The warden lifted up all the lines and, sure enough, there were magnets tied on the end of each line. "Well, I know of no law against it," said the warden, "take all the debris you want." And with that, he left. As soon as he was out of sight, the three blondes started laughing hysterically. "What a dumb cop," the second blonde said to the other two, "doesn't he know that there are steelhead trout in this river?!" A blonde took her dog to the vet for its annual check-up. "Your dog is overweight," the vet said. "You should cut back on his food a little and make sure he gets some exercise. Try playing fetch with him." "That's impossible," the blonde replied. "I can't play fetch with my dog." "Why not?" asked the puzzled vet. "Because," the blonde said, "he can't throw." I have more but, I don't want to type anymore. =P I thought of this one and I wanted to type it. A blond, a redhead, and a brunette were going to be shot in a firing squad for stealing a comb. First, the redhead was going to be shot. When the captain said "Ready...Aim..." the redhead pointed east and yelled "Tornado!" The squad turned to look and the redhead escaped. Next was the brunette so she did the same thing except she pointed west and yelled "Hurricane." She then escaped as well. Last the blonde was up. The captain said "Ready...Aim" and the blonde pointed at them and said "FIRE!"

Wich one is MORE funni?? (do NOT own)? 1.The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray: "Take only ONE. God is watching." Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies. A child had written a note, "Take all you want. God is watching the apples." 2. I want to suck you ... lick you ... wanna move my tongue all over you ... wanna feel you in my mouth ... yep, that's how you ... eat an ice cream! 3.A blonde calls her boyfriend and says: "Please come over here and help me. I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get it started". Her boyfriend asks, "What is it supposed to be when it's finished?" The blonde says, "According to the picture on the box, it's a tiger." Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle. She lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table. He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns to her and says, "First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be able to assemble these pieces into anything resembling a tiger". He held her hand and said, "Second, I'd advise you to relax. Let's have a cup of coffee, then" he sighed, "let's put all these Frosted Flakes back in the box." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ pICK ure Fav!

blond joke? A group of blondes walk into a bar. One of the women tells the bartender to line up a row of drinks for all of them. The gals lift their glasses and toast, "Here's to 51 days!" and they proceed to down their drinks. Once again, they tell the bartender to "line 'em up", and once again they toast 51 days and down their drinks. The bartender says, "I don't get it. Why in the world are you toasting 51 days?" One of the blondes explains, "We just finished a jigsaw puzzle. It had written on the box '2-4 years,' but we finished it in 51 days!"

Oldie, but goodie Blond joke......? A group of blondes walk into a bar. One of the women tells the bartender to line up a row of drinks for all of them. The gals lift their glasses and toast, "Here's to 51 days!" and they proceed to down their drinks. Once again, they tell the bartender to "line 'em up", and once again they toast 51 days and down their drinks. The bartender says, "I don't get it. Why in the world are you toasting 51 days?" One of the blondes explains, "We just finished a jigsaw puzzle. It had written on the box '2-4 years,' but we finished it in 51 days!"

i haven't heard this one before, did you?....? A group of blondes walk into a bar. One of the women tells the bartender to line up a row of drinks for all of them. The gals lift their glasses and toast, "Here's to 51 days!" and they proceed to down their drinks. Once again, they tell the bartender to "line 'em up", and once again they toast 51 days and down their drinks. The bartender says, "I don't get it. Why in the world are you toasting 51 days?" One of the blondes explains, "We just finished a jigsaw puzzle. It had written on the box '2-4 years,' but we finished it in 51 days!"

Record breaking blondes??? A group of blondes walk into a bar. One of the women tells the bartender to line up a row of drinks for all of them. The gals lift their glasses and toast, "Here's to 51 days!" and they proceed to down their drinks. Once again, they tell the bartender to "line 'em up", and once again they toast 51 days and down their drinks.The bartender says, "I don't get it. Why in the world are you toasting 51 days?"One of the blondes explains, "We just finished a jigsaw puzzle. It had written on the box '2-4 years,' but we finished it in 51 days!"

Are these Blond Jokes Funny? Star if funny!? Please read all of them! If you dont, you will miss out on some laughs! 1. Two blondes decided that this Christmas they wanted to cut down their own Christmas tree. So they drove two hours into the country and walked deep into the woods to find the perfect Christmas tree. They had planned the trip well, especially considering that they were blond. They were dressed warmly with boots, warm coats and hats. They had a chain saw, hatchet, a bag to protect the tree and rope to drag it back to their car. Every detail was covered. They searched and searched. They had gone to all this trouble, nothing but the prefect tree would do. They searched for hours through knee deep snow and biting wind. Finally, five hours later with the sun beginning to go down, one blonde says to the other, "I can't take this anymore. I give up! There are hundreds of beautiful trees out here. Let's just pick one whether it's decorated or not!" 2.Three blonde friends died together in a car wreck. They found themselves standing in front of the pearly gates with St. Peter. He told them that before they could enter heaven, they had to tell him what Easter was about. The first blonde said, "Easter is a big holiday where we give thanks, have a big feast and eat turkey." "Nooooo," said St. Peter. "You don't get in." The second blonde said, "Easter is the holiday that we celebrate Jesus' being born of the virgin and give gifts to each other." "Nooooo," said St. Peter. "You don't get in, either." The third blonde said, "Well, I know what Easter is all about. Easter is a Christian holiday which coincides with the Jewish Passover. After Jesus celebrated Passover with His disciples, He was betrayed by Judas and turned over to the Romans. They crucified Him on a cross. After He died, they buried him in a tomb and put a huge boulder in front of it." "Very good!" said St. Peter. The blonde continued. "Now, every year, the Jews roll the stone away and Jesus comes out. If He sees his shadow, we have 6 more weeks of basketball." St. Peter fainted! 3.On the first day of training for parachute jumping, a blonde listened intently to the instructor. He told them to start preparing for landing when they are at 300 feet. The blonde asked, "How am I supposed to know when I'm at 300 feet?" "That's a good question. When you get to 300 feet, you can recognize the faces of people on the ground." After pondering his answer, she asked, "What happens if there's no one there I know?" 4.How do you keep a blonde busy for hours? Scroll Down. ---> <----- Scroll Up 5.Three blondes are sitting by the side of a river holding fishing poles with the lines in the water. A Game Warden comes up behind them, taps them on the shoulder and says, "Excuse me, ladies, I'd like to see your fishing licenses." "We don't have any," replied the first blonde. "Well, if you're going to fish, you need fishing licenses," said the Game Warden. "But officer," replied the second blonde, "we aren't fishing. We all have magnets at the end of our lines and we're collecting debris off the bottom of the river." The Game Warden lifted up all the lines and, sure enough, there were horseshoe magnets tied on the end of each line. "Well, I know of no law against it," said the Game Warden. "Take all the debris you want." And with that, he left. As soon as the Game Warden was out of sight, the three blondes started laughing hysterically. "What a dumb Fish Cop," the second blonde said to the other two. "Doesn't he know that there are steelhead trout in this river?" 6.A blonde calls her boyfriend and says, "Please come over here and help me. I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get it started." He asks, "What is it supposed to be when it's finished?" The blonde says, "According to the picture on the box, it's a tiger." Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle. She lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table. He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns to her and says, "First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be able to assemble these pieces into anything resembling a tiger." He takes her hand and says, "Second, I want you to relax. Let's have a nice cup of tea, and then....." he sighed, "we'll put all these Frosted Flakes back in the box." 7. A blonde was driving home after work and got caught in a really bad hailstorm. Her car was covered with dents, so the next day she took it to the repair shop. The shop owner saw that she was a blonde, so he decided to have some fun. He told her just to go home and blow into the tail pipe really hard, and all the dents would pop out. So, the blonde went home, got down on her hands and knees and started blowing into her car's tailpipe. Nothing happened. She blew a little harder, and still nothing The last riddle didn't go all the way! :( sorry guys. There ya go! A blonde was driving home after work and got caught in a really bad hailstorm. Her car was covered with dents, so the next day she took it to the repair shop. The shop owner saw that she was a blonde, so he decided to have some fun. He told her just to go home and blow into the tail pipe really hard, and all the dents would pop out. So, the blonde went home, got down on her hands and knees and started blowing into her car's tailpipe. Nothing happened. She blew a little harder, and still nothing happened. Her roommate, another blonde, came home and said, "What are you doing?" The first blonde told her how the repairman had instructed her to blow into the tailpipe in order to get all the dents to pop out. Her roommate rolled her eyes and said... "HEL-LOOOOOOOO ...You gotta roll up the windows!!!

A group of blondes? A group of blondes walk into a bar. One of the women tells the bartender to line up a row of drinks for all of them. The gals lift their glasses and toast, "Here's to 51 days!" and they proceed to down their drinks. Once again, they tell the bartender to "line 'em up", and once again they toast 51 days and down their drinks. The bartender says, "I don't get it. Why in the world are you toasting 51 days?" One of the blondes explains, "We just finished a jigsaw puzzle. It had written on the box '2-4 years,' but we finished it in 51 days!"

star if u like....heres a joke? A group of Sardars walk into a bar. One of the sardar tells the bartender to line up a row of drinks for all of them. The sardars lift their glasses and toast, "Here's to 51 days!" and they proceed to down their drinks. Once again, they tell the bartender to "line 'em up", and once again they toast 51 days and down their drinks. The bartender says, "I don't get it. Why in the world are you toasting 51 days?" One of the sardar explains, "We just finished a jigsaw puzzle. It had written on the box '2-4 years,' but we finished it in 51 dayzz * plz

Read this Blonde Joke? A group of blondes walk into a bar. One of the women tells the bartender to line up a row of drinks for all of them. The gals lift their glasses and toast, "Here's to 51 days!" and they proceed to down their drinks. Once again, they tell the bartender to "line 'em up", and once again they toast 51 days and down their drinks. The bartender says, "I don't get it. Why in the world are you toasting 51 days?" One of the blondes explains, "We just finished a jigsaw puzzle. It had written on the box '2-4 years,' but we finished it in 51 days!"

Lesbian book. Is this extract any good? Amongst my tears I find her eyes and she makes me forget why I ever felt the need to cry. I blink. I feel the tears fold over the edge of my eyelid and dart down my face. I blink again, clearing the fear that had impaired my vision. The softest skin of her thumb strokes away my tears and traces the line of my cheek. She tucks my hair behind my ear and as I look up at her my whole world falls into place. She is the last piece of my jigsaw puzzle, the only piece I really care about. I reach for her. I draw her closer, close enough to feel her heart beat against my body, a rhythm I find so comforting. I slip my hands around her face and pull her into me. She presses her lips hard against mine, I push back and feel the way she gives into me, her lips softening, parting, all I need to slip my tongue in beside hers. I am so aware of her hands on my waist, holding me so close that I know she won’t ever let me go. Our lips are working so perfectly together, sliding gently over and into each other. I pull on her bottom lip allowing my teeth to run across the base of her, soft enough as not to hurt her, but hard enough to make her know how much I want her. Her hands slide up and over the prominent bones of my shoulders, pushing my blazer to the floor, spilling the contents of my pockets, a sharp reminder that I am a student. Her student. I wrote it by the way. :) Book is in progress.

Are Canadians aware Canada is more than one piece of land? Because there are fault lines in Victoria, British Columbia and in and around Lake Ontario because the earth has plate tectonics. (which is why you can get quakes). Earth is not one solid sphere, it is really a bunch of Plates that form like a jigsaw puzzle and there are cracks in the earth's crust called fault lines, and they move in opposite directions causing a "slip", known as an Earth Quake every so often. Most of Canada is in the North America Plate, but the West part of BC is on the Pacific Plate, same divide as the San Andreas Fault in California. This means the land of Canada has a crack in it, so it's not the same soil. Are Canadians aware of this? Also there are holes in Canada's crust which creates for volcanic hotspots, right? Arent's there volcanic-pruned parts of Canada in BC near Washington State? Lastly, Canada is shifting a few centimetres farther west every year due to continental drift. The U.S. Army nor NATO can defend Canada from continental drift. It will be very hard to arrest the North Atlantic Ridge for doing this to Canada. It's not like we can declare war on these geological forces. They are very determined to move Canada West through Atlantic Sea Floor Spreading.

More hilarious Blonde Jokes. Are you ready for them? Brunette Joke A young brunette goes into the doctor's office and says that her body hurts wherever she touches it. "Impossible," says the doctor. "Show me." She takes her finger and pushes her elbow and screams in agony. She pushes her knee and screams, pushes her ankle and screams and so on it goes. The doctor says, "You're not really a brunette are you?" She says, "No, I'm really a blonde." "I thought so," he says. "Your finger is broken." --- Meteor Crater As a Delta Air Lines jet was flying over Arizona on a clear day, the copilot was providing his passengers with a running commentary about landmarks over the PA system. "Coming up on the right, you can see the Meteor Crater, which is a major tourist attraction in northern Arizona. It was formed when a lump of nickel and iron, roughly 150 feet in diameter and weighing 300,000 tons struck the earth at about 40,000 miles an hour, scattering white-hot debris for miles in every direction. The hole measures nearly a mile across and is 570 feet deep." From the cabin, a blonde passenger was heard to exclaim, "Wow! It just missed the highway!"   Blonde Quote I'm not offended by all the dumb blonde jokes because I know I'm not dumb...and I also know that I'm not blonde. - Dolly Parton --- The Jigsaw Puzzle A blonde calls her boyfriend and says, "Please come over here and help me. I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get it started." He asks, "What is it supposed to be when it's finished?" The blonde says, "According to the picture on the box, it's a tiger." Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle. She lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table. He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns to her and says, "First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be able to assemble these pieces into anything resembling a tiger." He takes her hand and says, "Second, I want you to relax. Let's have a nice cup of tea, and then....." he sighed, "we'll put all these Frosted Flakes back in the box."

Where is the missing 3/4 of Earths continental crust? I have a problem with logics in plate tectonics: If the crust once covered the whole Earth, where has it gone? Did it peel off into space? How can this be explained? All the continents would fit like a jigsaw puzzle on a smaller globe. How does that fit with plate tectonics? If you have a broken vase, throw away 3/4 of it and still you are able to put it together as a smaller vase, what does that prove? What is the mechanism that distributes these jigsaw pieces on the globe so that it is basically possible just to push them towards each other along fault lines to make them fit, if they never were together at the same time? Or has the continents shrunk? Why are the sea floors exactly the same age on both sides of the Atlantic? Why is the spreading accelerating? Subduction is not supported by observed data to the extent needed to explain geology. Subduction is used as an excuse because no other acceptable explanation is available. Take Antarctica; surrounded by a great rift zone. How could all that ocean floor have subducted inwards, towards Antarctica? Come on! What happens when you apply a force to all sides of a curve/round object? It stops! You can try it with an egg. That´s how they used to build stone bridges. So how does subduction happen? Explain please!

english (LAC) help, please answer soon? 1. Choose the sentence fragment. (Points: 5) Dew glistening on the tiny green leaves of the young plants. Although some of the seeds had already sprouted, these hadn't. A small herd of buffalo grazed in the valley below us. The wind, cold and powerful, swept through the city, and some trees felled power lines. 2. Choose the complete sentence. (Points: 5) Mark rolling out the dough and The Student greasing the pan. For once, the whole family, including all the aunts, uncles, and cousins, was together. Following directions being essential for proper assembly. From someone I didn't know and from a country I had never visited. 3. Choose the run-on sentence. (Points: 5) If you start saving now, you will be able to buy a car sooner. A worn yellow quilt was lying at the foot of the antique bed, a gift from their grandmother. His helmet bore the number of the firehouse, which was more than 100 years old. There were only a few dancers on the floor, the couple soon became the center of attention. 4. Choose the subject of the sentence. Look in the index for a mention of this type of error. (Points: 5) index mention (you) type 5. Choose the subject of the sentence. Tuesday morning the Red Wheelbarrow Gardening Center will open. (Points: 5) morning Tuesday morning Red Wheelbarrow Gardening Center Center 6. Choose the subject of the sentence. Last year, wasn't Carson City in Nevada near our campsite? (Points: 5) year Carson City City Nevada 7. Identify the entire verb phrase. The whole event had been secretly planned by the Wong twins. (Points: 5) had been secretly planned planned had been had been planned 8. Identify the entire verb phrase. Hadn't you ever been to a state fair before? (Points: 5) Hadn't ever been Had ever been Had been Hadn't been 9. What kind of complement is the underlined word? Fill the bucket with potting soil. (Points: 5) direct object indirect object predicate nominative predicate adjective 10. What kind of complement is the underlined word? This jigsaw puzzle is too easy for me. (Points: 5) direct object indirect object predicate nominative predicate adjective 11. What kind of complement is the underlined word? Mom, give us a break, just once. (Points: 5) direct object indirect object predicate nominative predicate adjective 12. What kind of complement is the underlined word? Isn't this movie The Black Stallion? (Points: 5) direct object indirect object predicate nominative predicate adjective 13. What kind of complement is the underlined word? Have you met Dr. Carlos Whitman, Sally? (Points: 5) direct object indirect object predicate nominative predicate adjective 14. What kind of complement is the underlined word? The winner of the first place ribbon for science is Robin Serranos! (Points: 5) direct object indirect object predicate nominative predicate adjective 15. What kind of complement is the underlined word? E-mail Dad a copy of the photograph tonight. (Points: 5) direct object indirect object predicate nominative predicate adjective Thanks =] Could you answer the words that were supposed to be underlined? (I have the words that were supposed to be underline have "*"'s around them) ..opps, here is the link to the words that were supposed to be underlined... http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20090108142206AAzR8a5 ..thank you Mai Tai =]

Some blond jokes for all the folks on here ...enjoy? How do you kill a blonde?..... Scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool. How did the blond explain how her helicopter crashed? She said it was getting cold, so she turned off the ceiling fan. How can you tell if a blonde has been using your lawnmower? The green WELCOME mat is ripped all to shreds. What's the advantage of being married to a blond? You can park in handicapped zones. What happened to the blonde tap dancer? She slipped off and fell down the drain. How can you tell which tricycle belongs to the blonde? It is the one with the kickstand. Where do you look for blonds' obituaries? Under "Home Improvements." Did you hear about the blond who thought she discovered that she had a twin brother? She didn't realize he was looking in a mirror. Did you hear about the blond who never learned to water ski? She couldn't find a lake with a slope. Why couldn't the blond bob for apples? Her sister was using the toilet. A blond is going to London on a plane; how can you steal her window seat? Tell her all seats going to London are in the middle row. How do you make a blonde laugh on Saturday? Tell her a joke on Wednesday. Why did the blonde put her finger over the nail she was hammering? The noise gave her a headache. Why don't blonds have elevator jobs? They don't know the route. Did you hear about the blond who just bought an A.M. radio? It took her two weeks to figure out that you could play it at night. Did you hear about the blonde who couldn't wait to see 20,000 leagues under the sea? She said that she loved baseball, and was surprised that there were so many teams. Why did the blond stand in front of a mirror with his eyes closed? She wanted to see what she looked like asleep. What does a postcard from a blonde’s vacation say? Having a wonderful time. Where am I? Why do blonds have TGIF on their shoes? Toes go in first. Why did the blond scale the chain-link fence? To see what was on the other side. Why did the blond tip-toe past the medicine cabinet? So he wouldn't wake up the sleeping pills. Why did the blond get so excited after he finished the jigsaw puzzle in only six months? Because on the box, it said "From 2-4 years." Did you hear about the blond who shot an arrow into the air? He missed. A young blonde, wanted a pair of alligator shoes, but was reluctant to pay high New Orleans prices. "I'll just catch my own alligator," she told one shopkeeper," so I can get a pair of shoes for free. Later the shopkeeper drove home. He spotted the blonde standing waist-deep in a bayou, shotgun in hand, with a huge alligator closing in. She took aim and shot the creature between the eyes. The shopkeeper watched in amazement as she struggled to haul the carcass onto an embankment where several other dead alligators were lined up. "Darn!" the blonde shouted in dismay. "This one isn't wearing any shoes either!" A blonde goes to get her hair cut. The hair stylist cuts for about 30 minutes, hands the blonde a mirror and asks, "How do you like it?" The blonde says, "It's okay, but could you make it just a little longer on the back?" There is a blonde who goes into a store and says, "Excuse me sir, can I buy that television?" The guy said, "No, I don't sell anything to blondes." So the blonde goes home colors her hair red and goes back to the store. She says, "Excuse me sir, can I buy that television?" He says, "I don't sell anything to blondes." So the blonde goes home, colors her hair pitch black and goes back. She says, "Excuse me sir, can I buy that television?" He says," No I don't sell anything to blondes." She says, "How do you know I'm a blonde?" He says, "Only a blonde would think a microwave is a T.V." A blond gets tired of it all and dyes her hair. She's now a brunette and feels *much* smarter. Everyone tells her she's smarter. So she goes for a drive in the country one day and stops in a lane which is blocked by a herd of sheep. She gets out, talks to the farmer and says, "If I can guess how many sheep you have, can I have one?" He looks perplexed but says, "Sure." So she says, “Uh....157?" He says, "My God, that's correct. Take a sheep. So she wanders among the herd. She likes this one and that one and finally is very attracted to one that wags its tail and likes her. She picks it up and puts in it the car. The farmer says, "Can I make a deal with you?" "Sure," says she. He says, "If I can guess what color your hair really is, can I have my dog back?" A blonde is roller-skating down the board-walk one day. She's just skating along in her Lycra pants, smiling at everyone, listening to her Walkman. She decides that she really needs a haircut. She skates into the first salon she sees and goes up to the hairdresser and says, "I need a haircut." The hairdresser checks her out and says, "OK, sit down and take off your headphones." "No way!" shouts the blonde, "If I take off my headphones, I'll

DPI Question for a Personalised Photo Product? I'm looking to buy on-line a personalised photo jigsaw. At the moment the digital photo I like has a dimension of 2048x1536 (when I look at in in Explorer). When I open it up in Paint (I know!) it describes it as 72DPI. The website indicated that a file of 150DPI is required at minimum. The produced puzzle dimensions would be 470 x 710 mm Image aspect ratio 2:3 (What's that?) To avoid me calling....am I stuffed with this idea? Thanks Confused person!

Is my 2 year old advanced? Yes, every parent thinks their child is advanced. If he is, then keen for ideas. He was 2 in November. Behaviour includes: Jigsaw obsessed - tipped out 6, 12 piece puzzles today, sorted through and put them all together Knows 10 colours, names everything as it's colour - green pants, red top, white car etc Commando crawled at 5 months - much to my surprise. Walked 12 months exactly, running immediately. Jump 18 months, now balance one foot to put shoe on Laughs at movies. really watches Toy Story, yells out "go buzz" in action scenes. People comment on clear speech and advanced vocab for age Loves computer puzzles - good with memory card game etc Serious train obsession - easily named 20+ Thomas characters since 18 months Makes things out of objects - duplo, made a boat, cheese blocks, made a train. Can draw lines if requested or circle and face with 2 eyes, nose and straight line mouth What would keep him entertained? I have 3 month old as well so very busy. Thanks

Interactive stamps? I have to design a set of 6 stamps for the UK ( so needs some sort of British theme really ). The brief is to try and make them interactive and make teenagers and young adults want to start collecting them. I have many ideas but am still not fullt happy with any of them. I want something really unique. Here are a few of my ideas -Stamps that can have a section for the viewer to draw on them to make each one that little bit individual in some way, eg like a face shape and you have to draw in the eyes mouth and nose etc, or something on those lines. -One that is like a fortune cookie and you can peel a section of the stamp off to reveal your future. -One that shows and image and then if you use a magnify glass and you'll be able to see a puzzle or maze or something for you to solve. -Ones that are in the shapes of jigsaw pieces and when you collect the 6 and put them together it creates an image. Some of these are ok but if you have any crazy random ideas please let me know :)

Interactive stamps? I have to design a set of 6 stamps for the UK ( so needs some sort of British theme really ). The brief is to try and make them interactive and make teenagers and young adults want to start collecting them. I have many ideas but am still not fullt happy with any of them. I want something really unique. Here are a few of my ideas -Stamps that can have a section for the viewer to draw on them to make each one that little bit individual in some way, eg like a face shape and you have to draw in the eyes mouth and nose etc, or something on those lines. -One that is like a fortune cookie and you can peel a section of the stamp off to reveal your future. -One that shows and image and then if you use a magnify glass and you'll be able to see a puzzle or maze or something for you to solve. -Ones that are in the shapes of jigsaw pieces and when you collect the 6 and put them together it creates an image. Some of these are ok but if you have any crazy random ideas please let me know :)

which game has the most thrilling and absorbing story line? the story line of "Prince of Persia" was a bit confusing at first but then after playing all three versions it fitted like a wondrous jigsaw puzzle....and i loved it....

how's my poem analysis? the poem: life is a jigsaw puzzle and ppl are the little pieces all different colors and all diff. shapes and sizes sometimes you pick up a piece and match it w/ another and the colors blend perfectly and they fit into each other but in our case the colors clashed and the jagged little edges just wont fit together no matter how hard we push them i guess we could have changed but isnt it against the rules to cut up the pieces so that they fit together my analysis: To the Friend I Broke Up With (Pg. 92 Metaphor) In the poem “To the Friend I Broke Up With” written by Lynne Ferguson, the speaker presents the relation and bond between people by providing examples with metaphors throughout the entire poem. Also, the speaker suggests that friendship and love between people cannot be forced. The poem comes to a close with the speaker’s personal experience of breaking up with a friend who he or she found incompatible to associate with due to external and internal differences. The speaker utilizes a metaphor to ignite the poem with a mysterious tone with “Life is a jigsaw puzzle” (line 1). This metaphor not only serves as the central idea of the poem, it also aids the reader’s understanding of the poem and captures the audience’s attention. Reader’s will most likely question how life is a jigsaw puzzle and continue reading the poem. The speaker suggests that one is surrounded with many people of different qualities with metaphor “And people are the little pieces …And all different shapes and sizes” (lines 2-4). Further into the poem, the speaker paints an image into the reader’s minds with lines “Sometimes you pick up a piece…And they fit into each other” (lines 5-8), also to aid the readers to better understand the speaker’ personal experience and the main idea of the poem. In the second half of the poem, the speaker presents to the audience the story, “But in our case…so that they fit together” (lines 9-17). By solely telling the story, the speaker’s story is too weak to prove that one cannot be everybody’s friend. Giving life the quality of a jigsaw puzzle, however, solidifies the concept. Clearly, the central message of the poem “To the Friend I broke Up With” is that one cannot befriend everyone because of the varying cultural and personal characteristics each individual possess. The speaker also implies that people are not willing to change so that they can overcome and tolerate the differences through lines “But isn’t it against the rules…so that they fit together” (lines 15-17). With a deeper look into the poem, one can infer that the speaker is also referring to social issues such as racism and the people’s intolerance towards those who are different. In conclusion, people should not break up with friends because of differences, but instead befriend others because of similarities.

personalized jigsaw puzzle? where can i order my personalized jigsaw puzzle? something that doesnt cost too much. preferbly below $10 and with good quality. i found a place but people say when you piece it together, the quality isnt good and the lines of the pieces make the picture look ugly. thanks!

Can someone help me create my own riddle? It's for my english class and I'm really stuck. Here are some topics that I was thinking about doing 1. A jigsaw puzzle 2. Some sort of food 3. Julius Caesar/Macbeth/Hamlet It has to be a minimum of four lines and a maximum of eight. It also has to be one that any high school student can solve. Please include the answer with your riddle. Thanks so much.

was the apostle Paul really a scholar as people claim him to be and does his teaching really line up with God? Matthew 7:16 you shall know them by their fruits, does this scripture gives you a clue. For those who believed that the apostle Paul was a scholar, let’s define scholars first before claiming what Paul was. A Scholar is somebody who has a great deal of knowledge, especially an academic who specializes in a particular arts subject. No offense, but Paul was no scholar. The man went around causing havoc among God’s people and if he really had as much knowledge as people claim him to have, then he would have known who Jesus was through scripture since the old testament does tell you about the coming of Christ and he wouldn't have been going around doing the things he did. By the way, Paul teaching comes from the old testament books. So instead of saying he was a scholar tell people the truth, Paul was clueless. It wasn’t until Paul was baptize that Paul received the Holy Spirit and it was the Holy Spirit that was teaching Paul. So the things Paul knew came from The Holy Spirit, not from Paul being a scholar as the church would like you to believe. If anyone should be called a scholar, it would have to be the disciples since they walked with Christ and was taught by Christ. And to be able to sit down and write books from their experience, now that is what a true scholars, is. But to say that Paul was a scholar is like putting a little leaguer in with the big league. We had a nine year old boy who came to the mission to preach one day and the boy had a lot of knowledge. reminded me of the apostle Paul cause he just went from scripture to scripture preaching away but at the end of the service, when the guys went to ask the boy some questions, dealing with the things he taught the boy was clueless. If Paul was here today, I would have questioned his teaching since a lot of his letters are nothing but a big jigsaw puzzle scrambled around from different scriptures out of the old testament. There are letters that Paul writes that if you sat down (in which I did) and went and found where he says it is either written or scripture, it would have been found in all different part of the old testament. And for those who believe Paul to be all mighty with his teaching, he isn't. cause there are things that Paul says it is written, which isnt even in the bible. Paul was nothing but a man who sat down with a pen and a pad and picked scripture from the old testament to add to his letters including scriptures of his own belief which is not written as he claim. Paul may have been choosen by Christ, but Paul was also a liar according to his own letters. since not everything Paul claim to be written is found. anyone can sit down with a piece of paper and pen and write the things Paul wrote. the bible tells us to test the spirit and if you read for yourself the things of Paul, you will know that most of the things Paul wrote are taken out of context, words have been subtracted and added from the scripture he has used. I believe Paul's letters are what Paul believed but I would never teach most of the things Paul believes since most of the letters are contradicting and rather it was meant to a certain group of people, why in the world would we teach it to everyone if it was not meant for everyone. If we were to remove Paul's letters from the bible, I believe it would help us to grow and learn the ways of Jesus and not the ways of Paul. Paul says he doesn't allow women to preach, that is not any man call since that is not the way nor the truth. and for a man to tell a woman she can't preach, is not of God and if its not of God then it shouldn't be taught. God may have used Paul, but he also used Satan.

HELP ME PLEASE (math obviously)!!!!! (:? 1. Rita, Brittany, and Maria can complete a jigsaw puzzle in 1 hour and 30 minutes if they work together. Working alone, it takes Rita 1 less hour to complete the jigsaw puzzle than it takes Brittany, and Brittany completes the jigsaw puzzle three times as fast as Maria. How much time would it take each to complete the jigsaw puzzle working alone? 2. A line that a graph gets closer to as the value of a variable becomes extremely large or small. What is this? (For number 1, can you please tell me what you got for Rita please and for number 2, you have choices: inverse variation, discontinuous function, asymptote, excluded value, direct variation, rational function, rational expression, rational equation, continuous function, and extraneous solution.) REMEMBER: the final answer is of them working alone not together

What type of person/personality will he grow up to be/have? My 3yr old son eats his waffles row by row.? He also likes to put things in a perfect line, such as instead of playing with toy cars, he'd line them up in a row like train carts. When playing with blocks he'd rather make a big rectangle out of it. He knew his ABCs, numbers, colors, shapes, and 24p jigsaw puzzle by 2. A very hard headed, stubborn boy, very resistent to change. I'm curious if any of you parents had a child like that and how did they turn out to be when they get older? I don't think he has Aspergers. He is somewhat shy, but he plays with his brother, laughing, chasing, etc. He also communicates very well. He displayed all this before he was potty trained at about 3. Oh I forgot to mention. He used to have a tantrum when his banana breaks, or chips his crackers or cookies. He'd rather not eat them. He is now much better only does that sometimes.

Which internet games are you most likely to play? Breakout Snake Mindsweep Collapse Lines Mahjong Memory The Pusher - Mock Pimp/Dealer Game Slot Machine Pacman Slider Puzzle Poker Blackjack Tetris Jigsaw Puzzle Pong Darts Bejeweled The Shell Game (Ball/3 Shells)

Do we need to be alerted to the threat of Islam? Iran is preparing for Islamic take over? Why? To prepare the way for the Mahdi. Why do they want to destroy Israel & America? As is the plan. The Mahdi and nuclear are connected. In Ahmadinejad Sept 17 speach at UN,...When that day comes, the ultimate promise of Divine religions will be fulfilled with the emergence of a perfect human being who is heir to all prophets and pious men. He will lead the world to justice and absolute peace. In Qom in Jan. 2006, He preached, "We must prepare ourselves to rule the world and the only way to do that is to put forth views of the basis of the Expectation of the Return...of the Mahdi...Our interpretation is that the hand of the Almighty (Allah) is putting every piece of the jigsaw puzzle of the future of the world in place, in line with the goals of Islam. From book, "Showdown with Nuclear Iran" that I purchased from Amazon.com.

Hi!Funny or no? 24 Fun Things To Do In An Elevator... 1. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut up, dammit, all of you just shut UP!" 2. Whistle the first seven notes of "It's a Small World" incessantly. 3. Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside ask: "Got enough air in there?" 4. Offer name tags to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear yours upside-down. 5. Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off. 6. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act embarrassed when they open by themselves. 7. Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshake and ask them to call you Admiral. 8. On the highest floor, hold the door open and demand that it stay open until you hear the penny you dropped down the shaft go "plink" at the bottom. 9. Stare, grinning, at another passenger for a while, and then announce: "I've got new socks on!" 10. When at least 8 people have boarded, moan from the back: "Oh, no, not now, damn motion sickness!" 11. Meow occasionally. 12. Holler "Chutes away!" whenever the elevator descends. 13. Walk on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side. 14. Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce "You're one of THEM!" and move to the far corner of the elevator. 15. Wear a puppet on your hand and talk to other passengers "through" it. 16. When the elevator is silent, look around and ask "is that your beeper?" 17. Say "Ding!" at each floor. 18. Say "I wonder what all these do" and push the red buttons. 19. Listen to the elevator walls with a stethoscope. 20. Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers that this is your "personal space." 21. Announce in a demonic voice: "I must find a more suitable host body." 22. Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button. 23. Wear "X-Ray Specs" and leer suggestively at other passengers. 24. Stop at every floor, run off the elevator, then run back on. People Really Said These Things In Court Q: What is your date of birth? A: July fifteenth. Q: What year? A: Every year. Q: This myasthenia gravis - does it affect your memory at all? A: Yes. Q: And in what ways does it affect your memory? A: I forget. Q: You forget. Can you give us an example of something that you've forgotten? Q: All your responses must be oral, okay? What school did you go to? A: Oral. Q: How old is your son - the one living with you. A: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which. Q: How long has he lived with you? A: Forty-five years. Q: What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke that morning? A: He said, "Where am I, Cathy?" Q: And why did that upset you? A: My name is Susan. Q: Sir, what is your IQ? A: Well, I can see pretty well, I think. Q: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in the voodoo occult? A: We both do. Q: Voodoo? A: We do. Q: You do? A: Yes, voodoo. Q: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning? Q: The youngest son, the twenty-year old, how old is he? Q: Were you present when your picture was taken? Q: Was it you or your younger brother who was killed in the war? Q: Did he kill you? Q: How far apart were the vehicles at the time of the collision? Q: You were there until the time you left, is that true? Q: How many times have you committed suicide? Q: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th? A: Yes. Q: And what were you doing at that time? Q: She had three children, right? A: Yes. Q: How many were boys? A: None. Q: Were there any girls? Q: You say the stairs went down to the basement? A: Yes. Q: And these stairs, did they go up also? Q: Mr. Slattery, you went on a rather elaborate honeymoon, didn't you? A: I went to Europe, sir. Q: And you took your new wife? Q: How was your first marriage terminated? A: By death. Q: And by whose death was it terminated? Q: Can you describe the individual? A: He was about medium height and had a beard. Q: Was this a male, or a female? Q: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney? A: No, this is how I dress when I go to work. Q: Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people? A: All my autopsies are performed on dead people. Q: Do you recall the time that you examined the body? A: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m. Q: And Mr. Dennington was dead at the time? A: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy. The Blonde & The Coke Machine It was a really hot day and this blonde decided she would go buy a coke. She went to the coke machine and when she put her money in, a coke came out - so she kept putting money in. And since it was such a hot day, a line had formed behind her. Finally, a guy on line said, "Will you hurry up? We're all hot and thirsty!" And the blonde said, "No way. I'm still winning!" Poor Old Man This old man goes to the doctor's. "Help, Doc. I just got married to this 21 year old woman. She is hot and all she wants to do is have sex all day long." "So what's the problem?" "I can't remember where I live." Blonde in a Car A blonde walked into a gas station and said to the manager, ''I locked my keys in my car. Do you have a coat hanger or something I can stick through the window to unlock the door?'' ''Why sure,'' said the manager, ''we have something that works especially well for that.'' A couple minutes later, the manager walked outside to see how the blonde was doing and he heard another voice. ''No, no! A little to the left,'' said the other blonde inside the car. Daughter's Prayer A family was having some people to dinner. At the table, the mother turned to her six-year-old daughter and said, "Dear, would you like to say the blessing?" "I wouldn't know what to say," replied the little girl, shyly. "Just say what you hear Mommy say, sweetie," the woman said. Her daughter took a deep breath, bowed her head, and solemnly said, "Dear Lord, why the hell did I invite all these people to dinner!?!" Your Family Is So Poor Your family is so poor, when I went to your house I stepped on a cigarette and your Daddy shouted, “Hey, who turned off the heater!” Tooth Pulling A man and his wife entered a dentist's office. The wife said, "I want a tooth pulled. I don't want gas or Novocain because I'm in a terrible hurry. Just pull the tooth as quickly as possible." "You're a brave woman," said the dentist. "Now, show me which tooth it is." The wife turns to her husband and says: "Open your mouth and show the dentist which tooth it is, dear." Grass Eater A man was riding in the back of his limousine when he saw a man eating grass by the roadside. He ordered his driver to stop and he got out to investigate. "Why are you eating grass?" he asked the man. "I don't have any money for food," the poor man replied. "Oh, please come to my house!" "But sir, I have a wife and four children..." "Bring them along!" the rich man said. They all climbed into the limo. Once underway, the poor fellow said, "Sir, you are too kind. Thank you for taking all of us in." The rich man replied, "No, you don't understand. The grass at my house is over three feet tall!" You''re So Ugly You''re so ugly, when yo'' mama dropped you off at school, she got a ticket for littering! Pinocchio and Splinters One day Pinocchio came to Gepetto with a problem. "Every time I have sex with my girlfriend, she gets splinters. What can I do about this?" "Have you tried sandpaper?" Pinocchio hadn't, so he went to try it. "Pinnochio," said Gepetto a few weeks later. "How is the problem work out with your "Girlfriend?" said Pinnochio. "Who needs a girlfriend when you have sandpaper?" Clinton, Bush, and Washington... Bill Clinton, George Bush and George Washington were on the Titanic. As the boat was sinking, George Washington heroically shouts, ''Save the women!'' George Bush hysterically screeches, ''Screw the women!'' And Bill Clinton's eyes light up and he says, ''Do we have time?'' Not Going To Try This Again A blonde decides to try horseback riding, even though she has had no lessons or prior experience. She mounts the horse unassisted and it immediately springs into motion. It gallops along at a steady and rhythmic pace, but the blonde begins to slip from the saddle. In terror, she grabs for the horse''s mane, but cannot seem to get a firm grip. She tries to throw her arms around the horse''s neck, but she slides down the side of the horse anyway. The horse gallops along, seemingly ignorant of its slipping rider. Finally, giving up her frail grip, the blonde attempts to leap away from the horse and throw herself to safety. Unfortunately, her foot becomes entangled in the stirrup, and she is now at the mercy of the horse''s pounding hooves as her head is struck against the ground over and over. She starts to lose consciousness, but to her great fortune, Bobby, the Wal-Mart greeter, sees her and unplugs the horse. Mini Meanie The golf course was haunted by a malicious, evil leprechaun who exploited the ambitions of the poorer players. He popped up beside one unfortunate man who was participating in a club competition. "Look," he said, "if you agree never to court a woman, flirt with a girl or marry, I'll help you win." "Done," shouted the young golfer. The leprechaun was very pleased with conniving ways, and chuckled merrily. When the golfer was in the clubhouse being praised by the other members, the leprechaun popped up on the shelf of the locker. "Hey," said the little elf, "I have to have your name for my records. What is it?" "Father Murphy," grinned the golfer as he adjusted his Roman collar. Son: "Daddy, I have to write a special report for school, but I don't know what Politics is." Father: "Well, let's take our home as an example. I am the bread-winner, so let's call me Capitalism. Your Mum is the administrator of money, so we'll call her Government. We take care of your need, so let's call you The People. We'll call the maid the Working Class and your brother we can call The Future. Do you understand son?" Son: "I'm not really sure, Dad. I'll have to think about it." That night awakened by his brother's crying, the boy went to see what was wrong. Discovering that the baby had seriously soiled his diaper, the boy went to his parents' room and found his mother sound asleep. He went to the maid's room, where, peeking through the keyhole, he saw his father in bed with the maid. The boy's knocking went totally unheeded by his father and the maid, so the boy returned to his room and went back to sleep. The next morning he reported to his father. Son: "Dad, now I think I understand what Politics is." Father: "Good son! Can you explain it to me in your own words?" Son: "Well Dad, while Capitalism is screwing the Working Class, Government is sound asleep, the People are being completely ignored and the Future is full of Shit." The Deacon and the Preacher There once was this deacon and this preacher, and they had been friends for a long time. One day the deacon got sick and was put in the hospital, so the preacher decided to go and see his old friend. When he walked into the hospital room, the preacher noticed all the hoses and medical equipment attached to the deacon. The preacher walked over and kneeled by the bed and asked, ''How ya doing?'' The deacon motioned at a pad and pen on the nightstand. ''You want that?'' the preacher asked him, and the deacon nodded his head yes. So the preacher handed his friend the pad and pen and the deacon began to write. All of a sudden the deacon died. At his funeral, the preacher was asked to deliver the service. ''He was a good man and I'll never forget him,'' the preacher said, ''I was with him when he died and as a matter of fact I have his last thought in my coat pocket here.'' The preacher reaches into his pocket and pulls out the paper. ''Please, get up! You're kneeling on my oxygen hose!'' Too Smart A first-grade teacher, Ms. Brooks, was having trouble with one of her students. The teacher asked, "Harry, what's your problem?" Harry answered, "I'm too smart for the 1st grade. My sister is in the 3rd grade and I'm smarter than she is! I think I should be in the 3rd grade too!" Ms. Brooks had had enough. She took Harry to the principal's office. While Harry waited in the outer office, the teacher explained to the principal what the situation was. The principal told Ms. Brooks he would give the boy a test. If he failed to answer any of his questions he was to go back to the 1st grade and behave. She agreed. Harry was brought in and the conditions were explained to him and he agreed to take the test. Principal: "What is 3 x 3?" Harry: "9". Principal: "What is 6 x 6?" Harry: "36". And so it went with every question the principal thought a 3rd grader should know. The principal looks at Ms. Brooks and tells her, "I think Harry can go to the 3rd grade." Ms. Brooks says to the principal, "Let me ask him some questions." The principal and Harry both agreed. Ms. Brooks asks, "What does a cow have four of that I have only two of?" Harry, after a moment: "Legs." Ms. Brooks: "What is in your pants that you have but I do not have?" The principal wondered, why would she ask such a question! Harry replied: "Pockets." Ms. Brooks: "What does a dog do that a man steps into?" Harry: "Pants" Ms. Brooks: What's starts with a C, ends with a T, is hairy, oval, delicious and contains thin, whitish liquid? Harry: "Coconut." The principal sat forward with his mouth hanging open. Ms. Brooks: "What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft and sticky?" The principal's eyes opened really wide and before he could stop the answer. Harry: "Bubble gum" Ms. Brooks: "What does a man do standing up, a woman does sitting down and a dog does on three legs?" Harry: "Shake hands." The principal was trembling. Ms. Brooks: "What word starts with an 'F' and ends in 'K' that means a lot of heat and excitement?" Harry: "Firetruck" The principal breathed a sigh of relief and told the teacher, "Put Harry in the fifth-grade, I got the last seven questions wrong...... A priest, Jesus, and an old man tee off. The priest drives the green within 5 yards of the hole. Jesus slices the ball and it goes into the water hazard. He quickly runs across the water and hits his second onto the green 2 inches from the hole. The old man tees off with a short worm burner that trickles into the hazard. Soon after a fish eats the ball and swims across the pond with it in its mouth. Just then an eagle swoops down and snatches the fish with the golf ball and flies off. The eagle loses its grip and drops the fish on the green. The fish then spits out the ball and it rolls into the hole for a hole in one. Jesus turns to the old man and replies, "Play fair dad!" Yesterday I was at the local Wal-Mart. Now I was only in there for about 5 minutes and when I came out, there he was - a damn Motorcycle cop writing a parking ticket ... So, I went to him and said: "Come on Buddy, how about giving a guy a break?" He simply ignored me and continued writing the ticket. So, I called him a pencil necked Nazi. He then glared at me and started writing another ticket for having bald tires! So, I called him a sorry excuse for a human being. He then finished the second ticket and put it on the car with the first. Then he started to write a third ticket! This went on for about 25 minutes ... the more I abused and hurled insults at him, the more tickets he wrote ... But hey, I didn't give a damn. My car was parked around the corner ... A blonde girl comes rushing home to her mum and says: "Mummy mummy! Today at school everyone could only count to 3 but I can count to 5. Look - 1, 2, 3, 4, 5. Does that mean I am special mummy?" "Yes dear it does." The next day the blonde girl comes running in again and says: "Mummy mummy! Today at school everyone could only say the alphabet from A to C but I can go until E. Look - A, B, C, D, E. Does that mean I am special mummy?" "Yes dear it does." The next day the blonde girl comes rushing home and says "Mummy mummy! Today at school we were getting changed for physical excercises and all the other girls had really flat chests but I had these ...!" She opens her blouse and reveals a humungous pair of DD breasts. "Is it because I am special mummy?" "No dear it's because you are 25." A blonde desperately needed some money, so she decided to kidnap someone. So she went to the park and she grabbed this kid. Then she wrote a note saying, "If you ever want to see your child again, leave 10,000 dollars in a paper bag in the northwest corner of the park." then she signed it 'THE BLONDE' and told the kid to give it to his mom. The next day she went to the northwest corner of the park and got the paper bag. It had the money in it and a note from the mother that said, "How could you do this to another blonde?" Two blondes were walking through the woods and they came to some tracks. The first blonde said "These look like deer tracks." and the other one said: "No they look like moose tracks." They argued and argued for a while and they were still arguing when the train hit them. I knew a blonde that was so stupid that....... * she called me to get my phone number. * she spent 20 minutes looking at the orange juice box because it said "concentrate." * she put lipstick on her forehead because she wanted to make up her mind. *she tried to put M&M's in alphabetical order. *she sent me a fax with a stamp on it. *she tried to drown a fish. *she thought a quarterback was a refund. *she got locked in a grocery store and starved to death. *she tripped over a cordless phone. *she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept. *she asked for a price check at the Dollar Store. *she studied for a blood test. *she thought Meow Mix was a CD for cats. *when she heard that 90% of all crimes occur around the home, she moved. *when she missed the 44 bus, she took the 22 bus twice instead. *when she took you to the airport and saw a sign that said "Airport Left" she turned around and went home ~~~~ Couldn't learn to water ski because she couldn't find a lake with a slope. Got excited because she finished a jigsaw puzzle in 6 months and the box said "2 to 4 years" Couldn't call 911 because there was no 11 on any phone button. When asked what the capital of California was; answered "C". Baked a turkey for 3 days because the instructions said 1 hour per pound and she weighed 125. After losing in a breaststroke swimming competition, complained that the other swimmers were using their arms. A Blonde's Year in Review January: Took new scarf back to store because it was too tight. February: Fired from pharmacy job for failing to print labels...Helllloooo!!!... bottles won't fit in typewriter!!! March: Got really excited - finished jigsaw puzzle in 6 months... Box said "2-4 years!" April: Trapped on escalator for hours... power went out!!! May: Tried to make Kool-Aid... wrong instructions... 8 cups of water won't fit into those little packets!!! June: Tried to go water skiing... couldn't find a lake with a slope. July: Lost breast stroke swimming competition... Learned later the other swimmers cheated, they used their arms! August: Got locked out of my car in rain storm... Car swamped because soft-top was o pen. September: The capital of California is "C"... isn't it? October: I hate M &M's... They are so hard to peel. November: Baked turkey for 4 1/2 days... Instructions said one hour per pound and I weigh 108!!! December: Couldn't call 911... "duh" ... there's no "eleven" button on the stupid phone! Star if u like them!!!!

Funny Jokes!!!!!!? How do you make oil boil?? You add a "b" -------------------------------------------------- Fresh from her shower, a woman stands in front of the mirror complaining to her husband that her breasts are too small. Instead of characteristically telling her it's not so, the husband uncharacteristically comes up with a suggestion. "If you want your breasts to grow, then every day take a piece of toilet paper and rub it between your breasts for a few seconds." Willing to try anything, the wife fetches a piece of toilet paper and stands in front of the mirror, rubbing it between her breasts. "How long will this take?" she asks. "They'll grow larger over a period of years," he replies. The wife stops. "Why do you think rubbing a piece of toilet paper between my breasts everyday will make my breasts grow over the years?" "Worked for your butt, didn't it?" He lived. And with a great deal of therapy, may even walk again.. --------------------------------------------- Why are black people tall? because their negros (knee grows). ------------------------------------------------------------ guy walking down the street sees a woman with perfect breasts. He says to her, "Hey miss, would you let me bite your breasts for $100 dollars? "Are you nuts? !!" she replies, and keeps walking away. He turns around, runs around the block and gets to the corner before she does. "Would you let me bite your breasts for $1,000 dollars?" he asks again. "Listen you; I'm not that kind of woman! Got it?" So the guy runs around the next block and faces her again. "Would you let me bite your breasts just once for $10,000 dollars?" She thinks about it for a while and says, "Hmmm, $10,000 dollars, eh? Ok, just once, but not here. Let's go to that dark alley over there." So they go into the alley, where she takes off her blouse to reveal the most perfect breasts in the world. As soon as he sees them, he grabs them and starts caressing them, fondling them slowly, kissing them, licking them, burying his face in them, but not biting them. The woman finally gets annoyed and asks, "Well? Are you gonna bite them or not?" "Nah", he replies. "Costs too much..............." ------------------------------------------------------------------- Garden of Eden Story: Adam was walking around the Garden of Eden feeling very lonely, so God asked him, "What is wrong with you?" Adam said he didn't have anyone to talk to. God said he was going to give him a companion and it would be a woman. God said, "This person will cook for you and wash your clothes, she will always agree with every decision you make. She will bear you children and never ask you to get up in the middle of the night to take care of them. She will not nag you, and will always be the first to admit she was wrong when you've had a disagreement. She will never have a headache, and will freely give you love and compassion whenever needed." Adam asked God, "What will a woman like that cost?" God said, "An arm and a leg." Adam said, "What can I get for just a rib?" The rest is history. --------------------------------------------------------- Last in Line: A bus carrying only ugly people crashes into an oncoming truck and everyone inside dies. When they get to meet their maker, because of the grief they have experienced, He decides to grant them one wish each before they enter Heaven. They're all lined up, and God asks the first one what their wish is. "I want to be gorgeous." So God snaps His fingers, and it is done. The second one in line hears this and says, "I want to be gorgeous too." Another snap of His fingers and the wish is granted. This goes on for a while with each one asking to be gorgeous but when God is halfway down the line, the last guy in the line starts laughing. By the time there are only ten people left, this one guy is rolling on the floor, laughing his head off. Finally, God reaches this last guy and asks him what his wish will be. The guy eventually calms down and says: "Make 'em all ugly again." So, the next time you are last in line.......smile! ------------------------------------------------------- A business man got on an elevator. When he entered, there was a blonde already inside who greeted him with a bright, "T-G-I-F." He smiled at her and replied, "S-H-I-T." She looked puzzled and repeated, "T-G-I-F," more slowly. He again answered, "S-H-I-T." The blonde was trying to keep it friendly, so she smiled her biggest smile, and said as sweetly as possibly, "T-G-I-F." The man smiled back to her and once again, "S-H-I-T." The exasperated blonde finally decided to explain. 'T-G-I-F' means 'Thank Goodness It's Friday.' Get it, duuhhh?" The man answered, "'S-H-I-T' means 'Sorry, Honey, It's Thursday' -------------------------------------------------------------------- NEAR DEATH EXPERIENCE: A middle aged woman had a heart attack and was taken to the hospital. While on the operating table she had a near death experience. Seeing God, she asked if this was it. God said, "No you have another 43 years, 2 months, and 8 days to live." Upon recovery the woman decided to stay in the hospital and have a facelift, liposuction, breast augmentation, tummy tuck, etc. She even had someone come in and change her hair color, figuring since she had so much more time to live, she might as well make the most of it. She got out of the hospital after the last operation and while crossing the street was killed by an ambulance speeding to the hospital. Arriving in front of God, she demanded, "I thought you said I had another 40 Years?" God replied, "I didn't recognize you." -------------------------------------------------------------- HOW FAR Two blondes living in Oklahoma were sitting on a bench talking.... and one blonde says to the other, "Which do you think is farther away, Florida or the moon?" The other blonde turns and says "Helloooooooooo…….. can you see Florida...?????" ----------------------------------------------------------------- CAR TROUBLE A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells the mechanic it died. After he works on it for a few minutes, it is idling smoothly. She says, "What's the story?" He replies, "Just crap in the carburetor". She asks, "How often do I have to do that?" ------------------------------------------------------------------------ KNITTING A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the freeway. Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the blonde behind the wheel was knitting! Realizing that she was oblivious to his flashing lights and siren, the trooper cranked down his window, turned on his bullhorn and yelled, "PULL OVER!" "NO!" the blonde yelled back, "IT'S A SCARF!" --------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ----------------------------------------- Ok there was this blonde. she was minding here own business, just walking along. When she saw it......... A pure white steed...... With a Golden saddle and accessories.... Well the blonde had never ridden a horse before, and there was absolutely NO one to tell her that she couldn't...... "what the heck " she thought to her self, "I have always wanted to ride a horse before..." So not easily, she some how got her self into position. "Hey this isn't so bad" she thought But then something went terribly terribly wrong..... The horse started bucking.... Flinging the poor blond her hair got into here eyes and she couldn't see a thing... one of her feet came out of the stirrup! (She started screaming!!! For the horse to stop!! But it kept barreling on. She saw her life flash before her eyes..... Her head stated bobbing and hitting the hard hard ground.... just then When she thought that her Life was at its end, when she thought her lif was DOOMED The secuirity guard at wall-mart pulled the plug of the horse. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ How do you keep a blonde busy for hours? Scroll Down. ---> <----- Scroll Up. ---------------------------------------------------- Q: Why did the Blonde have square boobs? A: She forgot to take the tissues out of the box. ------------------------------------------------------------------ A blonde, out of money and down on her luck after buying air at a real bargain, needed money desperately. To raise cash, she decided to kidnap a child and hold him for ransom. She went to the local playground, grabbed a kid randomly, took her behind a building, and told her, "I've kidnapped you." She then wrote a big note saying, "I've kidnapped your kid. Tomorrow morning, put $10,000 in a paper bag and leave it under the apple tree next to the slides on the south side of the playground. Signed, A blonde." The blonde then pinned the note to the kid's shirt and sent him home to show it to his parents. The next morning the blonde checked, and sure enough, a paper bag was sitting beneath the apple tree. The blonde looked in the bag and found the $10,000 with a note that said, "How could you do this to a fellow blonde?" ------------------------------------------------------ Q. Why are there so many blonde jokes? A. Because the blondes are out with all the men, the brunettes and redheads have nothing better to do on Friday and Saturday nights. -------------------------------------------------------- Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Two, one to hold the light bulb and one to spin the ladder around! ------------------------------------------------- Two blondes decide they want to go on a mission to the sun. So, they go to NASA?They go to NASA. They tell NASA that they need to borrow a space shuttle because they are going on a mission to the sun. The NASA guy says "you can't go on a mission to the sun, you'll burn up." The blondes reply "Duh, that's why we're going at night. _____________________________________________________________________ A blonde woman goes into a department store and tells the salesman she wants a pair of pink curtains. He assures her they have a good selection of pink curtains. He shows her many kinds and different fabrics of curtains. She finally picks out a pink floral pattern. The salesman asks, "What size do you need?" She says, "15 inch." He exclaims, "15 INCHES! What room are they for?" She says, "It's not for a room, it's for my computer monitor." The surprised salesman exclaims, "Miss, computers do not need curtains." The blonde says, "HELLOOOOO... I've got Windows!!" --------------------------------------------- Men are like….Bananas. The older they get, the less firm they are. Men are like ….Vacations. They never seem long enough. Men are like….Bank machines.Once they withdraw they lose interest. Men are like ….Weather. Nothing can be done about either one of them. Men are like….Blenders. You need one but your not quite sure why. Men are like….Cement. After getting laid, they take along time to get hard. Men are like….Chocolate Bars. Sweet,smooth, and they usually head right for your hips. Men are like….Coffee. The best ones are rich, warm and can keep you up all night long. Men are like….Commercials. You can’t believe a word they say. Men are like….Department Stores. Their clothes should always be half off. Men are like….Government Bonds. They take so long to mature. Men are like….Horoscopes. They always tell you what to do and are usually wrong. Men are like….Lawn Mowers. If your not pushing one around, you’re riding it. Men are like….Mascara. They usually run at the first sign of emotion. Men are like….Popcorn. They satisfy you, but only for a little while. Men are like ….Snowstorms. You never know when he’s coming, how many inches you’ll get or how long he will last. ------------------------------------ OKay a blonde in the doctors office and. So the blonde says"doctor doctor i just hurt myself and all my bones are broken see" the blonde touches her leg, "ouch" she touchees her chin "ouch" then she touches her leg "ouch i told you" so the doctor says he'll do an x-ray watever and he comes back and says" i have good news and bad news" the blonde says" Good news" then the doctor says"well the good news is every bone in your body isn't broken, but the bad news is your fingers broken" __________________________________________________ * she called me to get my phone number. * she spent 20 minutes looking at the orange juice box because it said "concentrate." * she put lipstick on her forehead because she wanted to make up her mind. *she tried to put M&M's in alphabetical order. *she sent me a fax with a stamp on it. *she tried to drown a fish. *she thought a quarterback was a refund. *she got locked in a grocery store and starved to death. *she tripped over a cordless phone. *she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept. *she asked for a price check at the Dollar Store. *she studied for a blood test. *she thought Meow Mix was a CD for cats. *when she heard that 90% of all crimes occur around the home, she moved. *when she missed the 44 bus, she took the 22 bus twice instead. *when she took you to the airport and saw a sign that said "Airport Left" she turned around and went home *Couldn't learn to water ski because she couldn't find a lake with a slope. *Got excited because she finished a jigsaw puzzle in 6 months and the box said "2 to 4 years" *Couldn't call 911 because there was no 11 on any phone button. *When asked what the capital of California was; answered "C". *Baked a turkey for 3 days because the instructions said 1 hour per pound and she weighed 125. *After losing in a breaststroke swimming competition, complained that the other swimmers were using their arms. _____________________________________________________________ Joke Dictionary Gentleman: A husband who steadies the stepladder so that his wife will not fall while she paints the ceiling. Gentleman: A man who, when his wife drops her knitting, kicks it over to her so that she can easily pick it up Houswork: What the wife does that nobody notices until she doesn't do it Mistress: Somthing between a mister and a mattress Megaherts: Hurts real bad! Chicken: The only animals you eat before they are born and after they are dead _______________________________________________________ What's the best way to force a man to do sit?ups? Put the remote control between his toes. How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb? Three. One to screw in the bulb and two to listen to him brag about the screwing part. Why did God create man before woman? He didn't want any advice. Why did God create man before woman? Because you need a rough draft before creating your masterpiece. Why do little boys whine? Because they're practicing to be men. ---------------------------------------- A man is lying in bed in hospital with an oxygen mask over his mouth. A young student nurse appears to sponge his hands and feet. "Nurse", he mumbles from behind the mask, "Are my testicles black?" Embarrassed, the young student replies, "I don't know I'm only here to wash your hands and feet." He struggles again to ask,"Nurse are my testicles black?" Finally she pulls back the covers, raises his gown, holds his penis in one hand and his testicles in her other hand and takes a closer look and says,"There is nothing wrong with them." Fnally the mans pulls off his oxygen mask and replies "That as very nice but, I asked ARE MY TEST RESULTS BACK?" ----------------------------------------- Two old ladies were waiting for a bus and one of them was smoking a cigarette. It started to rain, so the old lady reached into her purse, took out a condom, cut off the tip and slipped it over her cigarette and continued to smoke. Her friend saw this and said, "Hey that's a good idea! But, what is that thing you put over your cigarette?" The other old lady said, "It's a condom." "A condom? Where do you get those?" The lady with the cigarette told her friend that you could purchase condoms at the pharmacy. When the two old ladies arrived downtown, the old lady with all the questions went into the pharmacy and asked the pharmacist if he sold condoms. The pharmacist said yes, but looked a little surprised that this old woman was interested in condoms, so he asked her, "What size do you want?" The old lady thought for a minute and said, "One that will fit a Camel." -------------------------------

What about this poem? Which is the best? I wrote this poem for the guy I like http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;... People seem to like it I wrote 2 others and combine them in to that one Here are the others: When I see you my heart skips a beat I don’t know why you make me feel complete You’re a jigsaw puzzle a discovery For me you’re the perfect mystery Trying to connect all of the parts Coloring in all the hearts You are a perfect disaster When I look at you, you look away faster Every time I see the sparkle in your eyes I know you can’t tell any lies When I tease you I’m not trying to make you mad I can’t think I like you so bad Just the sound of your voice makes me blush Is this really just another crush? AND: From the first time that I saw your eyes I knew you weren’t like other guys You were so cute just sitting there Trying to avoid my stare I love the way you always tried to act But you looked at me too and that’s a fact Every time I see you in line I get tingles down my spine I see you almost everyday And I never know just what to say I can’t help but smile when you look at me And I wish that you could see That all i'm doing is falling for you And I wish you felt the same as I do which of ALL 3 is the best thanks for all the help & support!!!

Review my history paper please...any suggestions appreciated? The Defeat of the Treaty of Versailles It was not the power of the opposition forces, liberal or conservative, of the U.S. that led to the final defeat of the Treaty of Versailles, but rather the political ignorance, inability and inflexibility of the President, Woodrow Wilson. With the surrender of Germany after WW1, it presented many different ways to create peace. Wilson in 1918 offered his plans for peace in the "Fourteen Points", the most important of which he believed was Article X, the League of Nations. One year later, Wilson led the Paris Peace Conference at Versailles to reach an international pact that included the points. However, the U.S. was never to sign the treaty or join the League of Nations Woodrow Wilson's ideas for peace were well rooted in thought, but in politically applying his ideas, he made unchangeable mistakes. In heading up the peace conference, Wilson made a serious mistake by not included World War One introduced the terrifying new concept of total war to an unsuspecting world. Nationalism and delusions of world conquest turned civilians into soldiers. Before the war, humans were developing technology at the fastest rate in history. After the war ended, President Wilson and the rest of the Allied leaders were responsible for the challenge of putting Europe back together the way one might piece together a jigsaw puzzle. Unfortunately, in a turn of events that would prove disastrous for the future of the world, President Wilson's ineptitude and stubbornness led to the Senate defeat of the Treaty of Versailles. President Wilson went to Europe as an idealistic progressive. He had grand plans for the future of Europe. However, when he met with the other leaders his ideas were destroyed. Nevertheless, Wilson consented to the terms of the Treaty simply because it contained what he saw as his legacy: the League of Nations. This League of Nations was not embraced by the world as a positive idea. One reason for its unpopularity was that it planned to prevent the things they opposed by using those exact same things as an opposition. For example, it wanted to use force to destroy force, war to prevent war, etc (Document A). Wilson's description of the future under the League of Nations was not a pleasant one. Wilson's description of the League of Nations was an endorsement of the imperialism that would come back to hurt the United States later in the twentieth century. Americans knew that the solutions that Wilson had proposed and endorsed were doomed to failure. Setting aside the flaws within the proposal for the League of Nations, there was still widespread doubt in the morality behind the rest of the Treaty. Despite the faults of Germany, the victors of the war had no right to punish them. People had no right to degrade the lives of millions and deprive a whole nation of happiness no matter what they did. (Document F) It wasn't just the media that expressed concern over the ethics behind the Treaty of Versailles. Wilson's own administration questioned it. Herbert Hoover, serving as Wilson's Food Administrator, wrote a letter to Wilson expressing his concerns. In it he said the American public would not support wrongs imposed in the Treaty. (Document D) Many people realized the future consequences of Germany's punishment and of having third parties unfamiliar with the politics central Europe redraw the boundary lines. The Treaty of Versailles was nothing more than a catalyst for the coming wars in Europe. The same nationalism and class struggles that ignited the First World War were present and intensified by the Treaty of Versailles. Instead of helping Europe recover the Treaty of Versailles intensified the problems of World War One (Document B). Great losses were suffered because of the way society had become leading up to World War One. Unfortunately, these casualties were just the first of many to be grieved by people from all over the world. The Treaty of Versailles is a document that was intended to maintain the peace that Allied soldiers fought for. In reality, it did just the opposite. The Treaty of Versailles created chaos both in Germany and throughout Eastern Europe. Even if Congress had ratified the Treaty, the same results would have occurred. Wilson's inability to see the larger picture caused him to give in to the demands of the other allied leaders. The Document given to the world by the Paris Peace Conference was flawed from the moment that Wilson arrived in Paris. All four hundred and forty articles contained in the document were dictated to the governments of the central powers. There was no compromise; there was no "treaty." The Treaty of Versailles was nothing more than the victors punishing their enemies. Wilson's ignorance to this fact led to the failure of the peace treaty, regardless of US commitment. The Treaty of Versailles was one of if not the most controversial issues of the 1917 - 1921 time period. Only World War I, and the passing of the 19th ame

what song is this? the lyrics are, "My life is a storybook with pages ripped out, A jigsaw puzzle with a piece missing, And a heartache that wasn't mended." along those lines.

help! please!!!!!!!? i need to do a creative activity preferably firework themed! it's for 4 - 6 year olds to do and all i can find is doing a jigsaw puzzle. can someone maybe give me a link for colouring pages with fireworks or something along the lines of that? thank you and also if you can think of any activites to do with them thanks

Best mma trash talks? what are the best trash talk put down lines in mma?please quote,ie"im gonna turn his face into a f*****g jigsaw puzzle man"-cb dollaway tuf 7.

What do you think of my poem? Writen for a 8th grader for a 8th grader? From the first time that I saw your eyes I knew you weren’t like other guys You’re a jigsaw puzzle a discovery For me you’re the perfect mystery Trying to connect all of the parts Coloring in all the hearts I see you almost everyday And I never know just what to say You are a perfect disaster, an organized mess How I feel about you, you could never guess When I tease you I’m not trying to make you mad I can’t think, I like you so bad All I’m doing is falling for you And I wish you felt the same as I do I wrote 2 others and combined them into this...and added a couple lines this is everyones favorite u think he will like it?

How Do You Arrange for Dyslexia Testing in the US? I suspect my daughter has dyslexia like her cousins. I homeschool in NYS, and would like to continue to do so. I'd like to have her tested by the school district. If I do ask the school, will they test for dyslexia, or just a non-specific learning disability? She's very bright and has good higher level reasoning skills, so there's no reason she shouldn't be able to read small books like Strawberry Shortcake all the way through. She skips lines, she leaves out small words like "to" or "the", she replaces some words (like "a" for "the") and, even though she can sound out 3 or 4 syllable words, short words like "bike" cause her trouble. I should've suspected something when she couldn't rhyme at 6, or do a 24-piece jigsaw puzzle. But I put her difficulty learning to read down to the surgery she had in 1st grade for being tongue-tied. How do I go about arranging a test? If she tests positive, can the district make me send her to school?

plot for the next batman film just an idea? my idea for the next batman film: stars the Riddler as a jigsaw (from the saw movies) type of character creating huge dangerous puzzle designs to save or brutally kill someone. in tone with the movies i think Ras al ghuls daughter would fit the bill to become catwoman recognizing Batman's style and technique she figures out that Batman was the man who killed her father and so swears revenge ( but doest know that the real batman is bruce). now comes the smart part. the Riddler is a genius and like bruce wayne comes from a rich bureaucratic family who is now so bored with money and wealth turns to murder for his thrills. the riddler know the identity of the batman and so has place himself in the firing line of gotham citizens (which gives him an endless supply of victims seeking the reward money) the police and the catwoman. during one sneaking attack the catwoman finds the riddler and knowing he knows who the batman is she strikes but the riddler catchs her and forces her to play his sick game. batman turns up and also gets caught and has to chose whether to save the catwoman or leave. he stays and finds out who she is and falls somewhat in love with her. unfortunately thats as far as i've got for an idea